He sees you when you're sleeping...
By Skippy the Elf

Hello boys and girls! This is Skippy the Elf come to tell you all about SANTA CLAUS!!!!

I have been Santa’s helper for over 200 years, and I know him best of all! He is a very generous man!

During the year, Santa watches all of you children, to see if you’ve been naughty or nice. We write down everything you do.

 If you have been a good little child, and your mommy hasn’t drained daddy’s bank account on Botox again, we’ll bring you anything you want (batteries not included)!!! And don’t think we don’t see you hitting your sister or stealing Daddy’s Playboys, because there is nowhere you can hide from Santa.

So remember, boys and girls, be good all year long, and when Christmas comes, Santa will make a special stop at your house and bring you some presents!

I watch you when you're sleeping...
By Bradford Davis

I know you think we’ve broken up for good this time, but you know I can’t just let you go. Even when you think you’re all alone, I’m there with you. Outside your window, in your closet, under your bed. The pictures I’ve taken get me through the day, but nothing compares to the soothing sound of your breathing, not even the video link I’ve set up hidden in your alarm clock. Don’t think of it as me stalking you. I just miss being able to hold you. During the day I’m always on edge, always feeling like I’m so close to just snapping and blowing away this whole place. But knowing that come nightfall I’ll be with you calms me down. But only some. Just, please don’t call the cops again, baby please? I just want to be near you. Even if you don’t know it, I will.