I’m Fergalicious
By Fergie

Fergalicious definition make them boys go loco. They want my treasure so they get their pleasures from my photo. You can see me, you can’t squeeze me. I ain’t easy, I ain’t sleazy. I got reasons why I tease ‘em. Boys just come and go like seasons. I’m Fergalicious. My body stay vicious. I be up in the gym just working on my fitness. He’s my witness. I’m Fergalicious. But I ain’t promiscuous, and if you was suspicious all that shit is fictitious. I blow kisses that puts them boys on rock, rock. And they be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno). They always claim they know me, comin’ to me call me Stacy. I’m the F to the E, R, G the I the E, and can’t no other lady put it down like me. Baby, baby, baby if you really want me, honey get some patience. Maybe then you’ll get a taste. I’ll be tasty, tasty. I’ll be laced with lacey. It’s so tasty, tasty. It’ll make you crazy.

No, I’M Fergalicious!
By Henry G. Ferguson

What in God’s name are you talking about? Only one person can truly be Fergalicious and it should be the man who invented the modern agricultural tractor. That’s right, me, Henry George Ferguson. Oh, but it doesn’t stop there little girl. I’m just gettin’ warmed up! Your body’s vicious? Well let me tell ya, you’ve gotta be in pretty peak condition to man the first solo flight in all of Ireland. That’s right, Dundrum to Newcastle with nobody but good old Fergie manning the plane. I’ve been dead almost 50 years, but I’ll come out of the grave right now and give ya a taste of the back of me hand! Fergalicious definition: being the greatest Irishman ever to chug too much Jameson; not being a dumb tramp who dresses like a 3rd tier prostitute and makes music for middle school dance parties. Kiss me blarney stones!