The Up In Smoke Issue
February 2008
- Wayne Ellington could end Orange County Drought
- Riots in Kenya leaves all of Africa officially screwed
- Bounce Treasurer smites staff for own pleasure
- Bounce Explains the Leap Year
Carolina Girls: Best in the World!
Bitch, I got the best pieces of ass in the world!
- Washing their hair (58%)
- Transferring to UNC (42%)
- Getting taken to the cleaners by every team (23%)
- Watching “Gossip Girl” online (12%)
- Taking Sidney Lowe jacket to the cleaners (3.3%)
- Cow Tipping (3%)
February 2008 Articles
- Center Spread: The BoUNCe Squad!
- Top Ten Things To Do When Your Roommate is Out
- New “smoker zeppelin” to provide
a solution for smokers on campus
- Italy’s youngest man dies at age 42
- Cool dude, 24 m, seeks
hot female. No fatties.
- Hillary Clinton proves strong men also cry
- Patriots go back in time, win every superbowl
- Smokin’ hot dancing causes inferno
- Ask Alli
- Harrison Ford falls down,
shatters dreams and pelvis
- “Video Game Hero” positively reviewed
- Evangelist escorted off B.J. Campus
- BoUNCe writer fails to get drunk
- Grammar Nazis declare war on the passive voice
- Awkward turtle attacks
- Alternate things to do with “that ho”
- X-treme Environmentalism
- GOP: Revolution was un-American
- The BoUNCe Halftime Show
--Spiderman that ho. --Barry Manilow that ho, reducing her to a sopping puddle of fawning and gratitude. --Superman her as planned; but then claim to have not, or at least assert that you were not aware of her Supermanning and played no part in it, despite the obvious fact that Supermanning her was your intent and, by definition, the essence of your profession. Then resign, thus Alberto Gonzalesing that ho. --Sautee that ho with olive oil, white wine, garlic, and shallots – exuberantly – until she is sufficiently Emeril Lagassed. --Obtain both the technology and the capability to rebuild her, but then withhold it, thereby reducing that ho to the state of post- 1978 Lee Majors. --Deflate the spirits of that ho with the inimitable raillery of Don Rickles. --Tom Brady that ho.