The It Came From HoJo Issue
October 2007


Darling, Will You Marry Me?

Oh My God! This Tiramisu is the Shit!!


What Moeser will do during year off:
- Play with his organ (58%)
- Use up Meal Plan (10.7%)
- Students (18%)
- Become a real boy (3%)
- Research (5%)
- Grow a 'fro (3.2%)
October 2007 Articles
- Center Spread: Glut-A-Thon
- Top Ten Ways to
Survive a Zombie
Attack
- Karaoke bad-ass would totally
sing 'We Didn't Start the Fire'
- It's all in the stars!
A horoscope for you
- Honor Court Finalizes Code of
Punishment's Latest Version
- Creator of facebook group
sued for breach of contract
- Chaucer code finally deciphered
- Two for one colorful
celebrations
- Ask Alli
- BoUNCe changes evil ways
- Honor court convicts masterminds
of South Campus gerbil fighting ring
- BoUNCe will not get you laid
- Britney Spears loses childrem
- Gardening with Nora...
Today's flower: Hermeracullis fulva
- New traditions at Meredith
- Out-of-state student discovers
Bojangles, gains 15
- And now, in the business world...
- Carolina Review Halloween Mask
Three months into her first semester, one New Englander gotta, wanna, needa, getta, hava Jenny Craig. Freshman student Alexis Bethune discovered Bojangles' Famous Chicken 'n Biscuits after her suitemate brought a 4-piece dinner back to Craige. Barely a month later, Bethune is a solid 15 pounds heftier.
"I'd never tasted anything like it," Bethune said of Bojangles' Bo*Berry Biscuit. "And my Lord, what do they put on these fries?"
Bethune, a cross-country runner, said her coach has yet to mention her weight, but that she realizes her performance on the track is suffering on account of too many Rajun Cajun Sandwiches. "I know it's not particularly healthy," Bethune admitted, "but tell me you're not craving some sweet potato fries. Like, right now."
Bethune still plans on competing in the Boston Marathon next April. Her high school friends, however, worry that her new taste for Southern cuisine will derail her ambitions.
"I saw a couple pictures on Facebook," said Kelly Gill, Bethune's best friend from St. Claire's Preparatory Academy. "I was like, 'whoa, who is she?' I couldn't believe Alexis had ballooned like that. Poor thing."
But not all of Bethune's friends are averse to her new, plumper look. Classmate Rob Granger, from Mebane, N.C., first noticed Bethune in Econ 101. "She usually sits near the front," Granger said. "So one day she's walking down the aisle, and I look up and realize all of a sudden that skinny chick from up north has got a serious ass."
