Deer has reveled in the unusually warm weather over the past few days in the southern part of heaven. Today being no exception, the bike ride after work again proved exhilarating - hair flowing in the southerly breeze warm enough for a ride clothed only in shorts. There had been some passing thoughts about global warming as, even in a clime where occasional days in the 70's occur throughout the winter, days in the mid 80's are most unusual - especially for the last moon of the declining year. But these had been fleeting, and he quickly reverted to pure enjoyment of the late afternoon.

All with a cost of course. Deer had been oblivious to the time as the sun sank on the western horizon, while mama slowly ascended in the east - first an enormous ochre globe, gradually lightening through shades of amber to gleaming white. "Lord's Antlers," Deer mumbled, realizing that he had less than an hour to get home, shower and get to McCorkle Place in time for the circle. The fast ride back to the home nestled in the woods exhausted him, but not so much that a quick cold shower would fail to bring him back to the exhilaration of a full moon evening.

When Deer arrived on Franklin street, he spied an assortment of folk already gathered at the northern end of the quad, oddly having chosen a roost at the feet of Silent Sam - that permanent denizen of this particular quadrangle and guardian of a life and time more than one hundred and forty years gone. A culture sadly built on the backs of slaves but not about slavery per se, rather more about beauty, honor and chivalry. "Most regrettable," he thought to himself, "that the entire culture of my forebears in this land has been reduced to nothing more than a picture of its least humane institution. Ah well, so it is with the culture of my Pagan forbears as well....history written, as usual, by the dominant social order."

Deer quickly clears these extraneous thoughts and, joining the group of friends old and new, reviews his simple plans for the evening. A quick turn about the quad, ending at its center near the Davey Poplar's massive trunk. Raising a circle and calling the quarters - widdershins on this last moon of the shortening days - calling our Lady and Lord, then opening for petitions. While the others prepare, Deer quickly places the simple accoutrements for their rite: a tiki torch to mark each of the quarterpoints of their circle, bowls of water and of salt on the stone bench just to the north of the ancient poplar, black and silver tapers for our Lady and Lord also on the bench, with a lone white pillar for the hearth. Then he returns to the group.

As they set out toward the west, Deer is acutely aware of the nearly total leaflessness of the quad which has but one evergreen within its confines. So tonight overarching branches, sporting a nearly opaque leaf cover in warmer months, are bare - far more closely resembling the lofty arches of a gothic cathedral than the canopy of a vast pavilion. In the west, Deer moves barefoot to the trunk of his ancient friend, a holly tree nearly three feet in diameter. As usual, prancing on a ground littered with spikes, Deer finds himself pricked by not one. "Blessed Be, old friend. Tonight we celebrate the sabbat of our Lady and Lord. We recognize in you the Dark King - fading with the fading days which precede the one outside, leading the year full circle to the birth of another." Deer then proceeds south where the old well stands beneath its neoclassical dome, playful waters providing a show of both sound and light. Here, Deer pauses for a slow drink of the well's crystal water before leading them east toward a small grove of aged weeping cherries which dance, leafless, in the evening breeze. On to the north, and the mighty, leafless oak who stands as guardian of the winter quadrant. "And greetings to you, old friend. We recognize in you the Light King, you who are now deep in the embrace of winter's slumber, but shall soon awaken to herald the glory of approaching spring."

Deer finally leads the group inward to the Davey's trunk, where all circle within the space limned by the four tiki torches equidistant from the massive trunk. As friends - human and other - watch, he meets the eldest here with their usual hug, and an exchange of pleasantries heard only by himself and the leaning tree. He wonders which, if any of the myriad faces dancing just beneath the old ones bark, present themselves to the others gathered here with him, then moves out toward the northern quarter. He flashes a broad smile at Jess and hugs her mightily. Then widdershins about the group with smiles and hugs, especially bearish ones for his sisters Morgan, Owl and Nymue - until he finds himself back in the north. "By love, the primary gift of spirit, is this circle cast," Deer pronounces before moving inward to the black stone bench. He takes up the copper bowl of sweet water and moves back to Jess' side. Circling widdershins again, he lightly sprinkles the ground, as well as each celebrant, until returning to Jess. "By water, the fundamental element of life, is this circle cast," he says, before exchanging the bowl of water for the pottery one of sea salt. And again about the circle widdershins from north to north, sprinkling the ground until the circle is complete. "By salt from the sea, as land emerged from primeval ocean, by earth is this circle cast." Laying aside the salt, Deer lights the white hearth-fire pillar - whose glow seems to spring out to fill their circle from the ground up to the very peaks of the overarching trees. "As in times of old, by fire is the hearth known, and by the hearth the home. Our circle is cast....in a place between all places and a time bounding all times we stand. May our hearth fire provide life to those at the four quarterpoints. And may the circle be always the home of our hearts." After surveying those gathered once again, Deer calls out "So mote it be," then with the responsive call from more voices than there are human celebrants, he proceeds to Jess and passes the hearth flame dancing atop its white pillar to her. He stands aside and watches as...

…Jess, still warm and fuzzy from Red Deer's hug, raises the hand holding her cherry wand.

"Spirit of the North, Mother Erde, sleep now while your children bide the long, dark nights. Hold safe our seeds and bulbs until they are ready for Spring. Show us the energy of potential: that the work we do tonight may seem to lie dormant, only to come to fruition in the coming months."

She turns to the West, passing the hearth flame to Morgan…

…Morgan, who has been immensely enjoying Red Deer's moving opening to tonight's ritual as well as the warm evening while wryly reflecting that it's warmer here than it has been lately back home in Arizona, reverently takes the hearth flame from Jess and moves to the Western quarter. Reaching into the folds of her lightweight cloak with her free hand, she brings forth a stick of pine-scented incense and lights it from the flickering light of the candle in her hand. The smoke seems to dance as it rises, and after watching it for a moment, Morgan gently blows on the flame at the end of the stick, then gently presses the other end into the soft ground. Then, looking skyward and raising her arms in the eternal gesture of invocation, she says in a clear, strong voice:

"To the guardians of the West and the spirits of the airy realms, we summon and invite You here to our Circle to witness and participate in our rites. Guide our actions and direct our supplications to Those to Whom we pay homage and beg the assistance of on this night when the Lady's light shines full upon us. Hail and welcome!"

After a moment more, Morgan lowers her gaze from the bright orb suspended in the sky and slowly moves over to Owl, gently touching her friend's shoulder in greeting before handing her the hearth flame. She then retreats to her place in the circle, and watches…

…With a warm grin to friend Morgan, Owl takes the flame and turns to Dear Deer, with a slight bow, then a wink at Jess, and a quick glance around the circle to see all who have come to join us at this FMR.

"It seems I am committed to the fire signs this season", Owl mumbles, and with a small sigh, begins to speak to the candle flame. Cupping her hand around the flame, she breathes deeply, and concentrates on getting the attention of the Fire Elemental. Soon, the flame is reaching for her fingers as she massages the aura surrounding the burning wick. As the flame dances over her hand, Owl turns to the South and sends her message to the Guardians of the Watchtower:

   "Hail Guardians of the South,
   warm Fire of comfort,
   Hot Fire of Cleansing,
   White Heat of Molten Lava,
   Black soot of change before renewal..
   Join us at this celebration of the changing on this the Full Moon.
   Hail, and be welcome!"

Owl lights the Quarter Candle, and passes the flame to East...

…Nym' takes the flame from Owl… The warmth of the night air seems strange with a new penetration to the layer of damp. The powers of Water have always spoken readily to Nym'. Yet for soon reason of late, instead of the siren song of the ocean it is the deep maternal flow of the rivers she feels most. Looking to the East…

   "Waters run deep in our soul,
   Carrier of emotions,
   Cleansing powers of water,
   Guide us with the depth and swiftness of your flow
   We ask your Blessing and Welcome you."

Nym' lights her candle and returns to her place to await…

...Deer, who comes to retrieve the hearth flame from her. Then, moving to sus' side, he offers her an arm, before proceeding with her to the stone bench which serves as their altar. There, Deer firmly plants the pillar upon which the hearth flame burns, between the black and silver tapers waiting there.

A hug for sus, for hugs are something Deer never gets enough of - especially during the winter - and he turns his attention skyward. "Mama, this is the last moon of the darkening year. What You have borne comes full circle before the next - flourishing and fading, fading and flourishing. Tonight, we honor the cold times....the times when You both mourn a loss and celebrate an expectation. Be with us tonight. Our loss is Your loss. Our anticipation Your joy."

Deer turns his gaze toward the tapers on their altar and, taking up the silver one, hold its wick just above the dancing flame of the hearth candle. "We reach out to You for certainty during this time of change. We desire to feel Your loving embrace, not only when we reside within Your womb awaiting birth, but when we languish in aging bodies awaiting return. And, just as Your flame now springs to life, seemingly from nowhere but certainly from heart and spirit," Deer proclaims just as the wick of the silver candle leaps into flame, seemingly of its own accord above the continued dance below it, "we anticipate that our Father will be miraculously renewed at the next turn of the Wheel."

Deer gently returns the taper to its place on the dark stone and then - raising his arms skyward - calls out, "Mother of seas and forests, Mother of night and day, Mother of five sacred things - we beseech You. Be here now!" The flame atop the Lady's candle dances even higher as Deer lowers his arms, turns toward sus and listens for her call...

…warm and tingling from the embrace of deer, suz steps forward and picks up the gold candle. she holds it, eyes closed, reaching out to the presence of He who Watches from the woods. like a herd stallion, distant on a hillside, alert for danger and aware of every member of his realm, kingly and aloof and very, very male, she can feel him. reaching the candle to the hearth flame, she lights it and sets it in place next to the brightly dancing silver one.

'father...lord...god of the wild places and the night creatures. i do not know your name. you have not made yourself known to me yet. i can feel you, but i do not know your face. as the dark season enfolds us like a cloak, we thank you for the bounty your sacrifice has bestowed upon us. we feel your absence as you rest and await rebirth. we rejoice in the imminence of your return. horned one, we honor you and ask that you let your presence be felt in this, our late year sabbat.

for myself, i ask that when the time is right, that i may know you as i know my Lady.'

head back, eyes upon the silver globe overhead, suz waits and listens. and in the darkness of her deepest heart, she feels a touch...gentle, yet strong. a whisper...'my lovely one...waiting is. i know you. when the time has come, you will know me.'

suz catches her breath. above the head of deer she can see, faintly outlined against the star-studded sky, the tracing of antlers, and a flash of green in her brother's eyes. her knees go weak. and in a trice, his strong arm is there supporting her. deer, who of all men makes every woman he comes in contact with feel more beautiful, more sensuous, more beloved. with a pulsing in her veins that is SO not sisterly, suz turns to wait for...

...with sus far more lightly on his arm than she realizes, Deer reels from the invocation he has just experienced. For so many years, even though Mama is who brought him to this path, Deer has experienced the divine masculine as within more than without. And as a result, he never stepped back far enough to completely recognize the very real differences in relatedness that he shares with Mama and Papa. Suddenly tonight, however, Deer feels that aspect of our Lord which is external....watching....waiting....all in sharp contrast to his usual experience of Him as internal....analyzing....acting....And for the first time, perhaps, Deer feels at home with embracing that maleness - not simply as a part of himself, but as a part of others as well. Perhaps this had been a left-over from his rejection of male dominated monotheism, that he had closed himself off from this aspect, this sense of Who and What our Lord IS, until now. Deer simultaneously recognizes an vast debt to his dear sister for immensely more than the beautiful words she had spoken about himself. Amid a hug and kiss, he whispers to her a private comment regarding her true familiarity with He Who Watches, before turning to address the remainder of their assemblage.

"Friends, sibs... our circle is cast and raised. The guardians fairly invited ward the four watchtowers. And graciously acknowledged, sweetly called - our Lord and Lady have each made Their presence known. Here....Now....Please bring to Their altar your dreams, your gifts, your requests. This moon passes swiftly - more so now, it seems, than most. But I am confident that if we seek to bend Their ears, They will yet be happy to listen..."

With sus still light upon his arm, her great strength and connection with the magical world evidently hidden more from herself than from any one else, Deer moves back to the circle's limn and watches...

…Fern steps towards the altar. Like so many in the circle, she feels the weight of so many of her roles upon her - parent of a teen, child of a recently-gone-blind 85 year old with SAD, wife of ....well ....Bob (who sits apart at AMOK gatherings reading), business owner, etc. Not to mention her swollen mouth, from Monday's surgery and today's diagnosis of infection.

"Blessed and High Ones, I thank Y'all for this beautiful night, for Your presence at our rites, for my chance to attend. I especially want to thank Y'all for the blessings shown to Landis, for whom I offered petitions at several other Full Moon Rituals. His chemo is over, his side effects were few and mild, and he is now growing in health daily.

"While I've got your ears, I need to ask for Your help with my son. Help him focus on What Must Be Done, before I kill him." Fern puts an gingerbread man, well decorated, on the altar as an offering. "Like the gingerbread man, he's a sweet kid, spicy and interesting. But, God/dess/es, he's so ....Well, he's so like the Gingerbread Man in the story. He INSISTS on trying to cross the river, to get away from What Must Be Done, relying on the fox and thus ends up getting eaten by worse issues. Let whatever God/dess/es he is called by hit him upside the head by a 'you by 4', or whatever s/he needs to do to get his attention! And show ME how to help get him focused!

"Speaking of me - thanks for telling me to get back to the dentist while the infection was in an early stage. Now, can you do something about the pain?" Fern adds a caramel popcorn ball to the fire as an offering of 'things she can no longer eat'. "Thanks in advance!"

Fern steps back, feeling a bit lighter, and waits for...

…Typo wearing a black robe and a silver pentacle glowing from the soft candle lights walks to the altar. shedding his robe to stand skyclad before the Lord and Lady he asks only one thing. May my love for my wife burn as strong through out our lives. Typo kneels down to his cast aside robe and pulls forth a small red candle from the inside pocket. Typo lights the candle and says to the Lord and Lady You brought Carielle and I together and for this I thank you, May our love grow everyday and everynight, And may our path always be walked in your name with Love and for each other and our Gods. Blessed Be. Typo stands back by his wife's side and waits...

…Storme slowly steps forward. Her heart is heavy and tears feel close. 'Lord, Lady, Guardians, tonight I need your help more than ever. I bring this petition for myself and my daughter. I recently discovered that my expartner abused not only my trust, but that of my daughter also. I had forgiven him for what he did to me but I cannot and do not feel I have the right to forgive him what he did to my daughter. Things have changed irrevocably and I mourn the way things were before. Help me to come to terms with this, to understand why it had to happen. As the seasons change and the days soon start to grow help me to grow again in strength. As green things start to grow and life begins anew, help us both to heal and grow.

Lady, above all, comfort and protect my daughter, help her to heal and help me to help her.

Lord, help us both, but especially my daughter, regain some of her trust and bright innocence.

Spirit of Earth, help us to stay centered and grounded and not let ourselves be cast adrift.

Spirit of Air, help us to think clearly and choose the right course of action.

Spirit of Fire, comfort us, when our passions seem icy cold, lend us strength and heat.

Spirit of Water, cleanse us and bless us.'

She kneels and places a bowl of earth planted with spring bulbs beside the other offerings. 'As these flowers grow and bloom, may my daughter grow in health and strength, as they bring joy to those who behold them, may she continue to bring joy and gladness to those who know her.'

Feeling no longer quite so alone but somewhat strengthened for the long road ahead and grateful to those who have made tonight possible, Storme returns to her place and awaits...

...Lyn steps forward. She searches for words to express what she's feeling. "Lord and Lady...I have been trying to handle what life has been sending my way. I've been trying to learn the lessons I need to and to hold everything together for everyone. I have always hated this time of year. For some reason, it has always been a time of sorrow and pain. This year seems to be turning out no differently.

Bill's job is very economy based and he is making a lot less than he did last year. The car we bought for him was lemon and we've had to sink almost $2000 into it. Greg was diagnosed as diabetic only days before thanksgiving. We've been fighting red tape to get health coverage for my youngest who has been without it since September. I found out last Friday that there has been problems with the heating system at my daughter's school and many children have been very sick.

And now...now I just got home to find a message saying I needed to call my sister-in-law back immediately. I just got off the phone from finding out that Bill's grandfather, "Ta", has terminal cancer and has less than a month to live. I've got to go down the hall, wake Bill up, and tell him this in a few minutes. I have to tell him that out of the four grandchildren, he cannot go to Florida to say good-bye, because we can't afford it.

And then, in another two hours, I have to be composed enough to have our scheduled visit with my daughter's principle about the problems with the heating system.

And yes, right now I'm feeling very sorry for myself. Lord and Lady...as much as I dislike the Christian idea of laying everything at their God's feet...I need to lay these things at your feet right now. I have struggled and tried to hold everything together. I find myself not up to the task. I find that I must ask for help and I must ask for strength. Help me to find the magick in this holiday season again despite, or maybe because of, all of this.

I also offer up my thanks. I am trying not to lose sight of all that I have. I have two wonderful, loving partners. I have three beautiful children (who drive me nuts but are being who they must be when they do) and I can only hope I can be the best parent I can to them. We have two working vehicles and I no longer have to play shuttle driver. We have a roof over our head, food in our cupboards, heat, and a few treats here and there. Greg's diabetes was diagnosed early and it is mild. If we do what needs to be done now, he may be able to avoid being on medications and avoid the complications that can arise from this disease. With the help of an arbiter, it looks like Emily has finally been picked up by CDPHP. And Katlyn seems to be relatively unaffected by what happened at her school. I can even see a "brighter" side with Ta. He has a lived a full life filled with love. He just found this cancer and will die quickly and at home as he wishes. I see this. I know this. Help me to accept this in my heart and to not lose sight of these things."

Lyn walks to the alter and lays down a handful of crystals and a couple of sticks of her favorite "temple" incense. She looks up and speaks again, "I know that I am not alone in dealing with life's issues and problems. I know there are others here and elsewhere who are up to their eyeballs and also struggling to cope. May comfort and peace and most of all moments of joy still be in their and my life." Lyn walks back to the circle and offers Fern, Nym, Storme, Owl, and Suz quick hugs…

…Owl steps forward, and takes the hands of Red Deer and Suz... knowing that the Drawing Down has been accomplished full well at this FMR. Watching the glow in their eyes, and feeling the tremors of energy flowing from each of them, Owl knows she is indeed in the presence of the Lord and Lady.

With a grin, she softly says, "Lord, Lady, I'm not here to petition, I'm here to say Thanks. There have been many times in my life when you've stepped in to help me thru difficult situations. Maybe not in the way I wanted, but in the ways which were needed to help me understand, and accept things which were difficult. You've given me a soft caress, and slap upside the head, and boot in the butt ...and each time, I've learned a bit more about myself, this world, and both of you.

Lord, you've taught me to love in so many ways. As a maiden, a mother, and now, as Crone. I see you as you were in your guise of Pan, and as you were as Warrior, and as Father, and now as the Sage. I see you clearly now, yet all of the underlying natures flicker constantly across your dear visage reminding me of the many times, and aspects when we have been together. Blessed Be my dear friend.

Lady, you have been my mentor, my teacher, my guide, my support in so many phases of my life. I see in you the strength, and the compassion, and the perversity of life ....and in the perseverance of life, I see your promise to all of us. And I hope I've been an apt pupil for your lessons. As a watch the familiar face of a friend, glowing with the essence of the Goddess, I'm awe filled and proud of her struggles along this path. I see the youth, and I see the nurturing mother, and I've seen the warrior within her ....and I also see the Crone she will become. What a beautiful face! Blessed Be!"

Owl hugs both Deer and Suz, and places a small feather on the breast of each ...then returns to her place in circle ..

…suz takes from her pocket an apple from her orchard. a runescript is inscribed around its plump body. she sets it on the altar and smiles. 'i am living my dream. i have so many blessings i can't even hold them all in a single thought. i have made so many incredible friends in the last few years. i have learned so much and caught a glimpse of how many lifetimes of wonder there is yet to learn. thank you.'

suz looks at the circle of amazing beings standing with her and sighs in utter delight before turning to await the next petition…

…pomb breathes in the warm night air and listens to the whispering cacophony of voices swirling in each breeze. she can pick out a few familiar phrases...o'connor, hurston, piercy...lilting, lazy, sharp, canny, profound...the kinds of rhythms and poetry this southern land cultivates. she takes out a copy of the first page of a story she's working on, twists it into a torch, and lights it on the altar candle.

"my offering is my work, which i hope you'll enjoy and want to read more of. lady, i want to petition you on behalf of my sister. this year she has been widowed with two young children, and now has had her uterus and an ovary removed. i sense she's being called to crone before her time...i have wrestled long over asking for help for her before because she's a catholic, but i know that in the form of mother mary you can hear her, and provide the comfort and strength that she needs.

"my lord, i thank you for the gift of these last warm days. it seems your fire is so strong this year that it's come back to please us again and again, more times than expected! the other folks here have felt it too, from what i hear! i ask that i can make my energy last a little longer, too. give me the spark of creativity to find a way to do enough work at home so i can take care of my little girl myself. and i make the intention that other's minds and eyes will be opened to thinking in creative ways as well, so they can see how it can be done, for many others who want to work, and do work hard, but not in the traditional places and times.

"and thank you, spirit of the tree, for nurturing the writers who make my life richer." she steps back into the circle, and another approaches... …Morgan steps forward once more, and after a brief acknowledgement of the Lord and Lady brought to flesh in the persons of Suz and Red Deer, sinks to her knees in the glowing evening. She bows her head and covers her face with her hands, for once surrendering the strict control she has been exercising on her emotions in this past month. For a moment she stays absolutely still, absorbing from this ritual the positive energies she so badly needs. After a few moments in which, like Lyn, she feels that she has laid the worst of her burdens at the feet of Those who understand, she speaks softly.

"Lady, Lord, I have had some heavy burdens laid upon me in this last moon. I have sought to teach and found myself learning instead. But the lessons seem to be variations of some even more intense ones learned so long ago, in my last true physical and spiritual crisis. Now my crises are not spiritual thanks to the guidance you have shown me, but they are still physical and emotional.

"Great Ones, I feel, once again, the shadow of an uninvited presence in the lives of my family. Help me, I beg you, to push it back once again, as I did so long ago with your help and strength, as well as those of my dear student and partner. I know that with Your help, nothing is unrecoverable. That this, as with all things, must pass. The words of a wise one but lately gone, George Harrison, remind me daily of that.

I ask for your continued blessings and guidance in the lives of those I love, as well as myself. I ask strength in the coming moon for what I must face, and the courage to do so. I cry to You and all the spirits for justice! Be with me through one of the greatest trials I have had to face in my life. This in Your many names do I ask."

After meditating for a moment longer, Morgan rises to her feet and looks at the moon through her tear-spangled eyes. Then, feeling strangely calmer, she takes her place in the circle...

…Harmony quietly steps forward from the circle.

She holds forth a small stone, with the rune laguz painted on it. This stone has been in my hand the entire circle, absorbing the wonderful energy here, and has been sustaining me. My offering to you is to give back to you a bit of that energy, held in this stone.

"Lord and Lady, life has been a real struggle the last few moons. I know I had some lessons to learn and really, I have been learning! (wry smile) I thank you for these lessons, hard as they are. I ask for the renewing energy represented in Laguz. I look at the rune and I see a waterfall...I intend to make reality that kind of focused energy. I ask for your help in renewing my waning energy. Lord and Lady, I'm going to keep requesting and making known my intent to find a job that will a) continue my professional growth as a librarian; b) sustain mine and my Love's lives without the need for me to work additional jobs or for her to work while going to school."

Harmony gazes intently upon the rune rock, holds it upward in the light of the candles and gently sets it at the feet of the Lord and Lady, in the persons of Red Deer and Suz. Harmony collects herself with a deep, refreshing breath and goes back to the circle to quietly watch…

...and Deer, seeing no further petitioners to come forward, returns to the black stone bench. Deer spreads his arms, and his smile, widely to encompass all those gathered.

"Father, Mother... 'tis once in a moon. Come to you we have, with our joys, our sorrows. With our fears and our needs. These we leave with You and request assistance in their management, always as You deem appropriate. Go if you must, stay if you will to partake of our revelry. So mote it be."

Then, turning to observe each quadrant deosil from the North: "Ancient Ones, elemental spirits, guardians of the watchtowers and four of the sacred things... You we thank for warding our rite. You we thank for your ongoing presence in our lives, for our connections with divine creation. Watch over those gathered here as each return home. But for now, onward in your merry ways if need requires or please remain and join in our celebration."

Finally, Deer addresses all those gathered in circle with him this eve. "Blessed Be!" before rushing headlong into the virtual sea of hugs and remembrances, which lead the group - even at this late hour - up the quad to Franklin Street, and on to the Carolina Coffee Shop where a late night repast awaits them.