Father of the Bride represents the emotional disarray that results when a family undergoes a stressful change. Set in San Marino, California, the small suburban town radiates friendliness and security. George Banks, a middle-aged husband and father, eagerly anticipates his daughter’s return from a long trip to Rome. George’s love for his family influences his physical and emotional life, which he openly displays through raw emotion, in the weeks before his daughter’s wedding. The wedding plans prompt more unfavorable physical expressions and outbursts than usual. George’s wife Nina forces him to accept and deal with this life-changing event. An analysis of the events surrounding George’s behavioral idiosyncrasies strongly supports the idea that the mention of the fiancé, Brian, or the marriage causes drastic behavioral changes. As a result of George’s various behavioral alterations, his wife grows irritated. At one point, she tells George that he is too much for her to handle. George’s actions also upset his daughter; his verbal exclamations and facial expressions often provoke a response of yelling and crying. To avoid tensions within the family, George must come to terms with his daughter’s new relationship, resulting in his changing role in her life. Although the frequency and intensity of George’s responses to change may seem erratic, an overwhelming number of men exude similar responses under similar circumstances (Appleton, 1981; Murdock, 1994; Rosen, 1998; Webster, 1998; Woolfolk, 1982).

Most fathers serve as protectors, caregivers, and bearers of knowledge and wisdom (Fields, 1983). At the point in the movie when Annie calls off the wedding, her father is there to console her and to review exactly what happened between her and Brian, in order to help her evaluate whether she is doing the right thing. Furthermore, the father should provide an "emotional passage into adulthood" for his daughter (Fields, 1983, p. 35). A balance between protecting her from the adult world and preparing her for it is essential because an overprotective father causes the daughter to develop a sense of powerlessness that leads to both abandonment and separation anxieties (Fields, 1983). One experiment involving 57 female college students predicted that fatherly affirmation linked positively with self-esteem but linked negatively with intimacy fears (Scheffler, 1999). Positive and negative results stem from the amount of attention a father bestows upon his daughter during her childhood, as well as the relationship they have when she is young. The positive results that come from the good relationship that Annie and her father had when she was young are that they presently have a loving relationship and are able to maintain an open line of communication. On the other hand, the negative results are the conflicts that arise because of George’s inability to separate from Annie.

Separation often yields a mourning state for the father, as shown by George’s drooping head and shoulders and frowning expression after Annie leaves for her honeymoon (Appleton, 1981). Physical separations include leaving for college, beginning a career, buying an apartment, and choosing a spouse; but psychological separation is the more serious form. Murdock categorized mental separations as "rejection, rebellion, betrayal, or mutual disappointment" (1994, p.173). If the father is psychologically unstable, he tends to have fits of anger and despair (Appleton, 1981). The father’s anger and despair may project themselves through his controlling tendencies, especially when a man causes the father-daughter separation, as Brian did in the film. Marriage is a separation in the form of betrayal. The father, consumed with jealousy, tries (perhaps unconsciously) to eliminate his rival (Woolfolk, 1982). George watched for Brian on "America’s Most Wanted" in order to have a good, solid reason for Annie to break up with him.

The father considers his daughter choosing a spouse as a betrayal of her love for him (Murdock, 1994) . Particularly painful for the father, separation forces him to surrender his control and role as the protector. In George’s case, his daughter now holds her fiancé in higher regard, shown by her dismissal of her father’s request followed by her immediate response to Brian’s same request. The daughter relinquishes her complete devotion to him (which hurts his ego), and he feels older because his daughter no longer fits the title "Daddy’s little girl" (Murdock, 1994, p.175). Despite the difficulty the father has dealing with his daughter’s newfound individuality, father-daughter separation is necessary for an emotionally healthy life (Murdock, 1994).

Proof of George’s denial of his daughter’s individuality lies in the way he still views his daughter, Annie, as a 7-year old with pigtails. In expectation of his daughter’s arrival home, George cleans and polishes her 10-speed bike. At dinner, with a big smile, he asks who would like to attend an upcoming concert and basketball game as family outings. When Annie tells her family about her engagement, her father first asks, with knitted brows, for her to repeat what she said, and when she does, he envisions her as a 7-year old talking about marriage and love (click here to see this clip). George reacts to Annie’s announcement by loosening his collar and asking his wife about the room temperature. He reacts verbally to Annie by telling her that the idea of marriage at 22 is ridiculous and that she is too young. George’s vision of Annie as a 7-year old demonstrates his attachment to the past--a time of stability. Attachment figures permit a feeling of safety and security that many do not want to relinquish later in life. The attachment level as an adult depends upon their current status of security, avoidance, and anxiety (Webster, 1998).

George’s acute attachment to Annie results in continuous comments and physical reactions to events and circumstances, which annoy his wife, Nina. Many parents do not understand why some people experience so much pain when their child leaves home (Rosen, 1998). Rosen argues that parents feel like they lack purpose without their children; they look back on what they have accomplished and insecurities commonly arise as a result (1998). Nina grows frustrated with George’s expression of his feelings concerning their daughter’s departure. George most commonly expresses his feelings by rolling his eyes. He also constantly unbuttons the top button on his shirt and loosens his tie as if to escape strangulation. Moreover, he frequently knits his brows and frowns, indicating frustration. He internalizes his feelings by talking to himself and by creating illusions of his outlook on the situation. Examples of these illusions include his visions of Annie as a little girl at the dinner table and his creation of the backyard wedding barbecue scene. When a child leaves home the parent experiencing pain often relies upon his spouse for support to help them through the emotionally rough time (Rosen, 1998). When George relies on Nina rather than internalizing his feelings concerning his relationship with Annie, his emotional outbursts lessen in number.

A study completed by Diane Elizabeth Dreher analyzing the father-daughter relationship in Shakespeare’s plays shows that many fathers feel threatened by men in their daughters’ lives (or even by demanding careers). As a result, they become "possessive, domineering, and defiant" (Murdock, 1994, p.177). The Dreher study revealed four fatherly archetypes: the reactionary father, the mercenary, the egocentric, and the jealous father. George shows characteristics of the reactionary, egocentric, and jealous father when he will not acknowledge that Annie has grown up, will not see her as an individual person, and refuses his consent of decisions that she has begun to make on her own (Murdock, 1994). Ideally, the father will encourage the separation and push his daughter into the world alone despite the long emotional adjustment period that he will need. The father’s role in this final stage is encouragement for his daughter’s individuation; in Annie’s case, through marriage (Appleton, 1981).

Marriage can break father-daughter bonds or build a closer father-daughter relationship; either way the purpose of the relationship changes (Murdock, 1994). Fathers who love their daughters undergo these experiences when their daughters marry or move away. Hollywood has over-dramatized the particular issue of parent-child separation, but that is what movies are supposed to do. The purpose of movies is to point out issues to people where they would not normally notice them. Despite George’s loving, fatherly actions where Annie is concerned, the stress of the wedding plans still cause occasional outbursts. Nina confronts George at one point and gives him an ultimatum, attempting to improve his erratic behavior. She makes him promise to stop hyperventilating, rolling his eyes, unbuttoning his top collar button, making faces, telling people how much his daughter’s wedding cost, and above all, she reminds him to remember his daughter’s feelings. After initial attempts at argument, he responds to her calm speech by agreeing to behave and by saying he loves her, which indicates that he plans to think before he acts in the future.

Appleton, W.S. (1981). Fathers and daughters: A father’s powerful influence on a woman’s life (pp. 1-29). Garden City, NY: Doubleday.

Appleton focuses on the developmental stages in a father-daughter relationship. The "father-daughter model" simplifies these developmental stages; oasis (childhood and thirties), conflict (adolescence and forties), and separation (adult and fifties). Childhood consists of crying, clinging, following, and protesting; father and daughter begin formations of early attachments. The conflict stage involves a transitional period where both the father and daughter may be moody, restless, and discontented with their relationship. The final stage, separation, yields a mourning state usually for the father, but sometimes for both. If the father has emotional stability, he will accept the situation, suffer through the separation, and continue his life. However, a more unstable psychological state results in fits of anger and despair on the father’s part. Ideally, the father will encourage the separation and ease his daughter out into the world and on her own despite the long emotional adjustment period that he will need as a result. The father’s supportive role in this final stage helps to develop his daughter’s individuation.

 Fields focuses on the role and influence a father plays in his daughter’s life. The father’s primary responsibility to his daughter is to serve as a "protector, guardian, custodian, champion." The sense of security that a father provides his young daughter builds her trust in him and in herself. A father should provide an "emotional passage to adulthood." The father provides care and shares his knowledge and wisdom. The balance between protecting and preparing his daughter for the real world has importance. If the father becomes overprotective or the daughter remains too dependent, especially financially, the daughter will develop a sense of powerlessness. Fear of abandonment and separation anxiety stem from the daughter’s lack of power; thus, attachment changes to a necessity. The father has not succeeded in letting go if his daughter is not prepared for individuation.

Murdock focuses on the father’s need for not only physical separation but also for psychological separation from his daughter in order for him to lead an emotionally healthy life. Many events cause physical separations, such as leaving for college or a job, buying an apartment or house, and marriage. These separations lead to psychological separations on the father’s part, characterized as "rejection, rebellion, betrayal, or mutual disappointment" (p. 173). The father considers his daughter choosing a spouse as a betrayal of his daughter’s love for him. Particularly painful for the father, separation due to marriage forces the father to give up his control and role as the protector. His daughter relinquishes her complete devotion to him (which hurts his ego), and he feels older because his daughter no longer fits the title "little girl." Because he feels threatened by a man in his daughter’s life (or even a demanding career), many fathers become "possessive, domineering, and defiant." A study on Shakespearean plays reveals four fatherly archetypes: the reactionary father, the mercenary, the egocentric, and the jealous father. Marriage can break father-daughter bonds or build a closer father-daughter relationship; either way the relationship’s purpose changes.

Rosen defines and explains the Empty Nest Syndrome and how it affects parents whose children grow up and leave as a result of further schooling, marriage, or job relocation. Whatever the case, parents have a difficult time adjusting to this drastic lifestyle change. There are many ways to recognize the specific anxieties, fears, and other emotions that may prevail at times such as these. Rosen suggested relying on one’s spouse for support or, if a single parent, finding someone who may serve as a temporary support system following the child’s departure. Many parents do not understand why some people experience so much pain when their child leaves home; the reasons do not all have to do with the child directly. Parents feel like they lack purpose without their children; they look back on what they have accomplished and insecurities commonly arise as a result. Different couples/single parents do different things when their children leave, such as a second honeymoon or worry-free dating period. They can now pay attention to their personal needs, including emotional, financial, and social needs, not just their children’s needs. Some key things that parents should do to keep the family close-knit when their children leave include encouragement toward the children to keep good relations among one another and to visit or maintain contact with each other. Parents mainly need to trust their children and reassure themselves that they did their job as parents by realizing their children’s successes and strengths, which allows their focus to center on enjoyment of the rest of their lives.

Scheffler and Naus examined the link between fatherly attestation to women's self-esteem and other psychosexual elements. The experiment included a questionnaire, given to 57 female college students, asking about their father's unconditional positive regard, their thoughts about their father's feelings towards their mother, their self-esteem, their fear of intimate relationships, and confidence with their womanhood and sexuality. The experiment concluded that fatherly attestation linked positively with the women's self-esteem and negatively with any intimacy fears they may have. Few studies have been dedicated to assessing the relationship between father and daughter, and the effect that this relationship has on both individuals. Often, psychologists contrast the mother's unconditional love and the father's love as a reward for a specific performance.

Webster, J. D. (1998). Attachment styles, reminiscence functions, and happiness in young and elderly adults. Journal of Aging Studies, 12 (3), 315-331.

Webster writes concerning a study done with 99 elderly adults and 96 younger adults in order to evaluate attachment styles, reminiscence functions, and happiness. The importance and impact of attachment on people’s lives has caused the completion of numerous studies trying to evaluate its significance. Attachment research often involves regression to the subject’s childhood experiences and events, which more often than not effectively determine the subject’s current attachment style. Also, assessing daily mental health measurements helps to determine attachment style because success and happiness on an everyday basis has a huge impact upon the types of relationships and attachments formed. Attachment yields advantages for both members of a relationship. During infancy, closeness to the parent or main attachment increases the likelihood of the baby’s survival. Attachment figures permit a feeling of safety and security which many do not want to relinquish later in life. The attachment level as an adult depends upon their current status of security, avoidance, and anxiety.

Three adult attachment styles have been identified in a study done by West, Spreng, Casares-Knight, Rose, and Leiper. They are as follows: 1."The secure individual emphasizes trust and comfort with closeness" 2."The avoidant individual is reluctant to trust and is characterized by a preference for maintaining emotional distance" 3."The anxious-ambivalent individual lacks confidence in the availability of the partner and has a strong, unsatisfied desire for emotional closeness." West and colleagues determined 5 defining adult attachment features; perceived availability, proximity seeking, separation protest, feared loss, and attachment figure use. The study results indicated that men relied less upon the attachment figure, and the researchers concluded that this is because it is less acceptable in our society for men to rely upon other people than for women to rely on others.

Woolfolk focuses on how a father reacts to rival men in his daughter’s life. Often times a father’s advice (perhaps unconsciously) causes the elimination of any rival. A father has manipulative influence over his daughter resulting from her strong devotion to him. The affectionate acts that young men display towards a daughter often offend the father. He becomes consumed with jealousy and then feels abandoned. This jealous anxiety may bring out the father’s controlling tendencies such as censoring what books his daughter reads or movies she sees, regulating what she wears, and punishing her for seeing a boy. Such controlling behavior destroys emotional ties between a father and his daughter. Also, these fatherly behaviors effect the daughter’s sexuality later in life. A father has a major influence over his daughter’s personality development, for example, as to whether she is introverted or outgoing.
 

Corliss briefly summarizes the movie and mainly supports the idea that, although the 1991 Father of the Bride was well developed and similar, it does not come close to surpassing the original, starring Spencer Tracy and Elizabeth Taylor. Corliss points out the movie’s important emotional and realistic aspects. He practically suggests that Father of the Bride represents well the middle-class family’s plight imposed by the massive finances involved in the planning of a decent wedding. Corliss also references the father-daughter relationship so commonly compared to the classic Lolita example. The movie review would have been at a loss if Corliss had not spoken of the original Father of the Bride. He compares the original to the 1991 remake by Disney, stating that the original film was not surpassed in quality. Corliss discusses the problems George Banks has concerning his daughter’s engagement and eventual marriage.

Kaufman does not necessarily take a stance on the movie, she just gives an overview of what happens. Kaufman uses various adjectives that convey her view on the movie, describing in her opinion the characters’ actions. Kaufman makes her review appealing to people; she describes the movie as "charming," and mentions one of the funnier lines to appeal to her audience’s humorous side. The review is overwhelmingly favorable, raving about Kimberly Williams’ and Steve Martin’s performances. She says that Martin is "funny and touching." Kaufman makes a joke at the end of the review about a situation in the movie, which arouses the prospective movie audience’s curiosity.

Lipton concentrates her review on Kimberly Williams’ role as Annie Banks, arguing that even though this was her debut movie performance, Williams did an excellent job filling Elizabeth Taylor’s shoes (Taylor starred in the 1950s version of Father of the Bride). Although Williams describes herself as "scared," her director (Charles Shyer) describes her as "unbelievably cool." Williams only held junior status at Northwestern University when she landed her first major movie role. Shyer and his filmmaking partner (Nancy Meyers) searched for a young lady who "could still be attached to her dad." The twenty year old Williams is still very much a "daddy’s girl." Her father admitted that watching Father of the Bride was difficult because thoughts of her real-life departure gave him pain, but for her was necessary and exciting.

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