Their names are Marge, Nancy, and Cheryl. They are the realtors who “served” us when we sold our Midwestern Home, and bought another in the Pacific Northwest. They are three personalities Ann and I will not forget. In some ways they are similar, in others they are different. However, when it comes to what drives them, it is the same, that commission they get for “helping” sell or buy homes.

Marge is probably 75 years old, and should retire. She doesn’t need the money. She’s loaded. She has a very nice home, high on a bluff overlooking a large river. But we know her sorrows. She often recited them to us over the week we spent looking for a home. I’m sure she does the same for most clients. Although very successful, her husband killed himself 25 years ago. Marge has not begun to get over this. She remains bitter and depressed. Her only child, a daughter, lives with her; along with the daughter’s “friend,” and the friend’s little girl. Codependency is a trait all three of these realtors share. Are those in the real estate profession all codependents? Probably not, but these three sure are.

Marge’s memory and mental functioning are fading, but she won’t quit. It’s as if she is afraid to retire. In the week we spent with Marge, many, and I mean many hours, were spent trying to read maps and find homes. Marge had lived in this area for most of her life. She had been in real estate the past 25 years, yet she could not find her way to most of the houses we wanted to see. Marge was of the opinion we had plenty of time (and money) to spend coming back the 2,500 miles from our Ohio home, until we finally found our home. The cost for a week of this searching comes to $2,000.

Marge would recite how hurt she had been by clients who had ditched her for another realtor. It was obvious she was giving us a message – “Please let me be the one who sells you a house.” “Please don’t get someone else.”

Before going further in this tale of three dear ladies, let me inform you that I am a retired pastor, and my wife a nurse. I mention this, because all three realtors played upon this reality throughout their time with us. Marge happened to be a member of our denomination, and she did not let this coincidence go unheeded.

Well, after a week with Marge we went back to Ohio, without finding a new home, and started our relationship with Nancy. Marge had obtained Nancy’s services for us. Here let the reader beware of what really happens when realtors “find someone special” as your realtor. In actuality they call the broker in charge of the office, and he or she gives your business to the person up next. When Marge called Ohio, Nancy was up next. Let the reader also know that when this type of arranging goes on, the one who makes the call gets 25 percent of the commission of the person “contacted.” A nice little arrangement isn’t it. This “getting a cut,” also takes place when realtors conveniently find you home inspectors, contractors to repair the home you are selling, and handymen to repair your new homes. Realtors get their monies in more than one way.

An interesting phenomenon took place soon after we arrived back in Ohio, and needed to sell our home. We were mildly complaining about Marge to Nancy, mainly about her slowness and memory loss. “Oh, I’ll get you another agent out there,” Nancy willingly piped in. Looking back, it doesn’t take a genius to know why Nancy was so willing. Did Nancy care about our ditching Marge, the person who made it possible for her to get one-fourth of the commission for the home we would eventually purchase? It’s “dog eat dog,” in Real Estate World!

Nancy’s codependency? She has two very old parents, which only she among her siblings is willing to care for. That’s what she told us more than once. She had trouble getting out of bed sometimes, because she had been up all night caring for them. Of course, they also happen to own property next to an airport, worth at least a million! Then there’s her aunt, whom she recently moved up from Florida, because she was being mistreated in a nursing home. How much money does the aunt have? I can only wonder. Her only child (she is divorced) is a son in his twenties whom she gets jobs for, like pulling out our shrubbery.

Nancy is proud to mention that she is on her fifth Mercedes, but quickly adds, so we wouldn’t get the wrong idea, that they’ve all been used. The one she presently owned was huge! Nancy works three hours a week at a prominent Ohio department store. She does this in order to have “nice” clothes. Although in her fifties, Nancy has what I call a “princess complex.” Know what I mean? She really doesn’t like to work. It’s as simple as that. She is lazy and gets by with as little as she can in serving her clients. Yet, she also is just as adamant about never, never allowing the dollar amount of her commission to be reduced. Even if it were a few hundred dollars out of several thousand, Nancy went bananas when I suggested that one or both realtor take a slight cut in commission.

Nancy consults fortunetellers, and doesn’t belong to any church. However, she was good at sounding pious, and talking religion talk around us, like some politicians we know. But Nancy can be really “NASTY.” Her mood can change in an instant, especially if her precious commission is in any way threatened. Then she becomes “Nasty Nancy.” Perhaps a nicer and truer nickname would be “Negligent Nancy.”

Cheryl is the third and certainly most deceptive of these three gems. She is very active in a fundamentalist mega church, and talks religion much of the time. She divorced her husband after eleven years of marriage and six children. She is still very close to all six, who live nearby, and gives them thousands of dollars each year. At forty-seven, she is still “taking care” of her children and her eight grandchildren.

Unlike Nancy, Cheryl is a workaholic. I am certain she brings in as much as $200,000 a year, much of which goes to her adult children. While driving around looking at homes, Cheryl was constantly interrupting our conservations to answer her cell phone. This annoyed us. However, Cheryl made it clear that she “had no choice.” Of the three realtors, Cheryl spent the most time being “religious,” and talking “God-talk.” Of course she knew I was a retired pastor. She talked about the Mega Church she and her large family attend, including the daughter who lives 95 miles North. She shared about the pastors, and how all TWELVE had moved from the South to North Side of the River. (We were home searching on the North side).

She used the phrases, “Lord Jesus,” “Holy Spirit,” and “Spirit,” a multitude of times. I even got tired of hearing it. “Now Don and Ann, I think if you really pray about this house, you’ll see it’s just for you.”

But Cheryl and the other two realtors (perhaps most realtors) share a personality trait; they are big liars! You don’t realize how much they lie to you, until sometime after the fact. Then the reality hits home, as you piece together what they said and the reasons they said it.

I would love to overhear conversations between a real estate agent who is working for a seller of a home, and one who is trying to get someone to buy the same residence. I think it would be very interesting to hear how they strategize. “You tell them it’s the estranged husband that’s making it hard to negotiate. Then maybe they’ll be more flexible in their offer.” “I’ll tell them that it’s you (seller’s realtor) who is being difficult. That will take the pressure off me, and hopefully get them to give up this hard line negotiating.”

“Hey, the buyers are in a real hurry to find a home, because they have to get out of their home in the Midwest. Let’s tell them a little white lie like the estranged couple aren’t talking to each other, so they’ll soften up on the price they are offering.”

“I told ‘my’ home inspectors not to find too much wrong with your buyer’s house, but discover only enough to make the inspection sound legitimate.” “This couple has more money than they put on. I know they will be able to shell out as much as ten thousand dollars on siding and major repairs. But I told the inspector, at the same time, not to overwhelm them.”

So, welcome to “Real Estate World.” It’s a tight and closed system, with the primary purpose of netting thousands of Realtors billions of dollars. The American Public is the victim. Each year we shell out huge amounts of our hard-earned monies to men and women who too often do as little as they can to earn it. It’s super efficient system, in which the Real Estate Profession has its routines down to a fine art. It’s a sales system filled with deception, intrigue, and corruption.

We, the American Public, have been made to believe we cannot sell or buy homes without Realtors. And because this profession is so tight knit and closed, it is very hard to sell your own home. Only 15 percent try it, with many of these grudgingly calling a Realtor after several months of no success.

How do Realtors sleep at night? Does their conscience bother them? Since going through what my spouse and I went through, I’ve asked these questions a number of times. The only answer I come up with: Realtors have so deceived themselves into believing they do nothing wrong, they are blind to their lying, cheating, and, yes, stealing so much money from their clients.