Yo Mama's So Stupid...

* She spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate."
* She has one toe, and bought a pair of flip flops.
* She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to makeup her mind.
* She got stabbed in a shoot-out.
* She told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk".
* When the computer said "Press any key to continue", she couldn't find the "Any" key.
* She thought 2Pac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
* When I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said "Cherry or Grape?"
* She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
* She sat on the TV and watched the couch.
* She thought St. Ides was a Catholic church.
* She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
* She was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin' "Free Lays!"
* She tried to drown a fish.
* She thought a quarterback was a refund.
* She got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
* If you gave her a penny for her intelligence, you'd get change.
* They had to burn down the school to get her out of third grade.
* She took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
* That under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics".
* She thinks socialism means partying.
* She tripped over a cordless phone.
* She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
* At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" she put "Sagittarius."
* She asked for a price check at the dollar store.
* It takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.
* If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
* She stands up on an empty bus.
* She studied for a blood test and failed.
* She died before the police arrived because she couldn't find the "11" button in "9-1-1".
* She thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center.
* She thought hamburger helper came with another person.
* She thought Meow Mix was a record for cats.
* She thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
* She invented a solar powered flashlight.
* She sold the car for gas money.
* When she saw the "NC-17" (Under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home to get 16 friends.
* When she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
* She went to Dr. Dre for a pap smear.
* She thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your phone bill.
* She ordered a cheeseburger from McDonald's and said, "Hold the cheese".
* When she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
* When she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport left", she tured around and went home.
* She peels M&M's to make chocolate chip cookies.
* She got locked in Furniture World and slept on the floor.