Goals
And Ambitions
(written
Summer '00)
I'm not sure what exactly I want to do with my life in terms of career,
family, leisure,etc. However, I do know some fundamental things I'd like
to accomplish or discover. In other words, I've got the general idea about
what I want in my life and how I want the rest of my life to unfold, I'm
just open to changes that may occur. I'll list my goals and ambitions in
terms of...
Education
Certainly
I'd like to continue my education at Carolina for at least the remainder
of my undergraduate career. If all goes according to plan, I'll graduate
in May 2003 with a degree in Political Science. Although I've been fairly
successful gradewise so far, I'd love to improve. In fact, I think I must
improve in order to be considered in the admissions departments of the
schools at which I've thought of continuing my education. Now that I'm
done with difficult and pointless General College classes like Math and
Spanish, I am confident that I can maintain a level of excellence that
would be more than acceptable in the most competitive admissions office.
I'm prepared to devote my life entirely to reach that level of excellence.
I know for a fact that I will not be able to immediately continue my education
after graduation in 2003. I will have to get a job in order to raise money
to continue my education. I've not really thought much about what kind
of job this will be. Certainly if the opportunity arose where I could work
in government or law for a couple of years I would take it. However, it's
impossible to tell right now if that opportunity will come up, so it's
necessary to plan in case it doesn't. Maybe I could teach for a couple
of years. After all, I'm familiar with the situation a lot of public schools
find themselves in, and I think I've got lots to give back that would help
the plight of the system to which I owe all my success. Teaching certainly
is a possibility.
I do plan on continuing my education. I'm not sure, though, whether I want
to pursue a graduate level degree in Political Science or a law degree.
Right now I'm leaning toward law school because there is more I could do
with a law degree than a more specific graduate degree. The only reservation
I have about going to law school is that I don't want to practice law.
It seems that most folks who go to law school end up hanging out their
shingle and practicing law all their lives. I certainly don't want to do
that. What I do want to do, however, requires that same law degree and
that same level of expertise. So, I'll probably go to law school. Right
now the law schools I'm considering are UVa, Penn, North Carolina, and
William and Mary. That list will change over the next couple of years as
my search becomes more intense and urgent. I fear that my mediocre math
grade my freshman year may keep me out of the more competitive schools
like UVa and Penn. I guess we will see!
Career
Although
I've thought about going into teaching for a couple of years after college,
I have never thought about teaching as my career. Certainly teaching is
a noble thing, and the idea of teaching and inspiring young people greatly
appeals to me. However, I know that teaching is not as glamorous as it
is when it's portrayed on TV and such. Plus the money is horrible. I could
never put up with the rules and red tape, the bratty parents, and the bad
pay that teachers have to deal with. It makes me mad because all those
things I've mentioned are serious impediments to the learning process.
Certainly teachers deserve better and the kids deserve teachers that don't
have to deal with those things.
I'd rather have a career where I can do something about the state of our
public schools, as well as other issues of interest. I'd like to work in
government, or maybe something
with
government like a lobbying firm
or something of that nature. Maybe I could work for the NEA and help teachers
that way. Anyway, I want to do something where I can have a say in things.
Those who know me know that I'm very opinionated, but I'm different than
other folks in that my opinions are based on reason and serious moral introspection,
not on shear emotion or feeling. I think the only way I could ever be satisfied
with my career choice is if I had a career where my opinions mattered in
the grand scheme. Working for government would give me the means to accomplish
that end.
I'm not sure
rather I want to go into Federal or state government. On one hand Federal
government deals with broader, more serious issues that effect everyone.
On the other, state government deals with specific issues that more directly
effect folks. It's a decision I'll probably have to make in the next couple
of years as my education becomes more specialized. 
I don't think I'll ever run for anything, although if I'm not satisfied
with what I can accomplish in a non elected position I may. I used to think
that I would want to run for something, but I've decided that I haven't
the necessary qualities that a successful politician would need. First,
I don't think I'm smart enough. And since in our present political culture
nobody is elected to serious office without an Ivy League diploma I've
already been excluded. Second, I'm not handsome enough. Although I may
be able to change that when I get some money and buy a couple of nice suits.
Third, I'm not patient enough and I'm not willing to compromise. Fourth,
I'm not rich enough and I won't be able to raise enough money cause I would
refuse to be bought. Those are probably the most important things, but
otherwise I think I have the right mixture of characteristics to be successful
in politics.
See,
I can kinda look like a politician! ...well, not really. Here I am sporting
the jaunty Carolina bow tie. I like this picture so I stuck in here as
well. How does Senator Hooper sound? I think it sounds good! And I wouldn't
have George F.Will criticizing me (cause he'd like the tie too much) and
I'd have Daniel Patrick Moynehan on my side (again, because of the tie).
Seriously, if I were to become a politician, I'd model myself after Terry
Sanford. He was the man! I can't even explain all that he did for the state
of North Carolina. If you want to know more about him I suggest you read
Terry
Sanford: Politics, Progress, and Outrageous Ambition by Howard Covington
and Marion Ellis. Terry Sanford is proof that you can be a progressive,
reasonable Democrat and a Southerner at the same time. Sanford was a Carolina
man himself (before he was tricked into becoming President of Duke University
where all the Yankees corrupted him) so he probably donned the Carolina
bow tie a couple of times.
Family/Personal
This
is the most important category certainly. In fact, I tell my friends that
this is the aspect of my future that I worry about the most. I worry about
my grades and my future career and things, but I could do without those
if I had to. I couldn't do without a family of my own. In fact, I'd give
up the career and the education in exchange for a good family life in a
heartbeat. Before I ever though about college, or politics, or anything,
I knew I wanted to be a father. That's the only thing I've always been
sure I wanted to be. But, I'm very worried about this. I'm very insecure
about this, and I'm worried that I won't find the right woman with whom
I can build a lifelong partnership. I'm worried that I won't have the type
of marital relationship that I want and need and that my children would
need. I'm worried that I won't be the type of father that I need to be.
All these things weigh on my mind constantly.
Honestly, even though I think about this a lot, it's not what's most important
to me right now. Of course my education is my top priority right now. However,
I feel that now is the time in my life when I should start to think
about this. College, after all, is supposed to be a place where you eliminate
your childish characteristics and start putting to use your ever expanding
collection of adult ones. So while I learn and mature intellectually, I
also look to learn and mature in terms of my relationship with other folks,
especially women. I think I know what I want from a relationship: partnership,
friendship, comfort, and, of course, love. I think I know what type of
women I want: a friend who will be my intellectual equal, my spiritual,
political and social ally, my confidant, my 'partner', the possessor of
a similar but distinct perspective. Before, the girls I would go out with
where just folks I wanted to have fun with. They weren't folks that had
all these things that I look for. Now, however, when I consider whether
or not I want to have a 'relationship' with somebody, I consider whether
or not they have these things. I still want to go have fun, but I feel
that I'm at a point in my life where a 'relationship' must be more than
just for fun; a 'relationship' must be used also as a learning experience
so I can make better decisions about how I prioritize my feelings, what
I really want, etc... so I think it's important to try to have 'relationships'
with women I could see myself devoting myself to. Boy was that sentence
grammatically messy! Maybe I'm going about this all wrong, but even now
I want the girls I would consider having a 'relationship' with, my potential
girlfriends, to have these characteristics. I would fall in love with a
woman that had all these things, that played all these roles in my life.
The woman I devote my life too, however, I will love with a love I can't
explain the origin of. Understand? That's about as concise a summary of
those feelings you will ever see.
Of course there is so much more to it than that. That's an issue I continue
to struggle with on a daily basis. Hopefully it will work out for me. Since
the prospect of having children is a little bit further off at the moment,
I can still view it more, um, idealistically. I would love to have a boy,
and, at the risk of sounding vain, name him after me. When I think about
my relationship with my father, I think about how he must be very satisfied
(or disappointed, gee I hope not) to see the man that he's created, that
most closely reflects who he is. I'm not saying that mothers don't
have an important role in raising a boy, but there are just some things
about being a man that a woman can't teach. Maybe I'm selfish, but I'd
like to see myself in a child. I'd like to benefit my son by imparting
my wisdom and character on him, and helping him become a man that everyone
could be proud of. I always joked that my destiny was to be the father
of President Wilson Broyles Hooper Jr., but I hope by the time my children
are old enough to be president there would be just as good a chance that
Claire Elizabeth Hooper or Caroline Olivia Hooper (two names that I think
are beautiful) could hold that office. I would like to have girls as well,
and for some reason I've always been partial to the idea of having a pair
of twin girls. I can't explain why that appeals to me, maybe I've been
hypnotized by my mom who's a twin herself. It doesn't really matter, though,
as I would be more than happy with any child I had. To think that a human
being is basically fifty percent you! That's amazing to me! Truly a miracle.
I think that series of articles did a pretty good job of explaining basically
what I'm looking for in my family/personal life. Like I said, though, I'm
open to change, and since I don't have too much experience in the fields
of serious relationships and child rearing, I don't really know what to
expect or what to look for. Hopefully it'll turn out well. I guess I'm
going to have to continue working, but also be patient and see what unfolds.
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